We are still feeling the financial pinch. I've been thoroughly fed up with DD for some time now. She is 17 and doesn't seem very motivated to get a job. I told her yesterday that I'm not getting her any new school clothes this year. None. The expensive things she has from Abercrombie, Hollister, and so on are strewn about all over her bedroom floor. She's not speaking to me, and DH disagrees with me too. He said "You got tons of new school clothes when you were her age." I fired right back at him, saying "Yeah, well my dad made enough money to pay for them." My husband says that we can find a couple of hundred for school clothes for her somehow. What a laugh. We are so tight right now we're barely making ends meet. I'm not doing it. I cut up my credit card for a reason, and the heck if I'm charging clothes for an ungrateful brat. That may sound harsh but I guess I'm feeling harsh right now.

I'm going back to school for sure. I'm taking accounting courses and the semester starts August 25th. This weekend my SIL is having a yard sale and I'm going to put any money I make towards school. Wish me luck.

I told my husband that things need to change, which he obviously knows. We looked through the course selection book together and he seemed really interested in Computer Forensics. I registered online and asked him when he will register. He said that he's decided to get another job instead of going back to school because we need money right now. He's been talking about this second job thing for months and has done nothing. I'm not holding out much hope for it happening anytime soon. If things are going to change I just need to take the plunge and do it myself.

Some good news, I sold a book on Amazon for $50.00! That's the most I've sold one for in a long time. I'll update my book totals another time. I feel so disenheartened with the $20 challenge thing right now. I had to close out my account to pay a big tax bill and am down to tucking stray dollars into my piggy bank at home. I won't give up, though.

It's been a while since I updated on my book sales, so I'll wade right in.

The View From Saturday - $2.01

Vanishing Acts - $4.91

Someone Like You - $

The Mavericks - $1.80 profit

The Great American Novel - $4.77

Standing In The Rainbow - $3.06

Airs Above The Ground - $2.65

Fix It & Forget It Lightly - $7.43

The Cheehakoes - $8.14

Ballad of the Whiskey Robber - $4.08

Snow Crash - $2.32

Light - $3.05

The $20 challenge total is $785.36 now. That is an invisible number, as I had to close out my account in order to pay taxes. Mean, nasty taxes! Now I have to figure out a way to replace that money.

I took a pile of clothing to the consignment shop, things that I purchased at the last few yard sales I went to. I took some yard-sale purchased household items to another consignment shop, so hopefully that money will start to trickle in.

We got hit with two tax bills right in a row. One was from a business I used to own and one was for our property taxes. The total amount was $4,200.00 and was a huge blow to the budget. I'm very frustrated and anxious about our finances right now. So, allow me to vent.

It seems like we owe everyone everything right now. The June mortgage payment was made Friday and it was late, but at least it got paid. DH picked up a minimum of groceries to last until next Friday.

I had to close out my $20 fund account. That just stunk but there was no getting around it. I know it helped to bail us out and all that, but it still makes me mad. It was a lot of hard work to get where I was and now I'm back to nothing.

When things get better I'm going to replace every penny I had to take out. Next month we have to pay the mortgage (hopefully on time) two home equity payments, the bank of dad (LOL) put gas in the cars, and so on and so on.

Right now DH and I don't make much money. We both have low-paying jobs. As we both work 40 hours, we make out somehow each month. My car is really old; his is OK for now. Our house is beautiful and we are happy here, but there is no way we can travel or afford extras.

Sometimes I get so tired of thinking about money. I'm seriously thinking about returning to school in the fall to complete my degree. The extra money that comes with having a college degree sure would help. Plus, I'm tired of looking at the same dead-end jobs I see in the paper week after week.

I make a little extra selling books and things. DH doesn't have the motivation to make changes in his own life and just between all of us it really bothers me. Mom always told me to make changes in myself if I want things to get better. That's good advice. So, I'm going to figure out what I can do to make things better and hope that DH follows suit.

I remember a couple of months ago, when I talked with him about this. I was feeling motivated about selling more items online, and told him that we each need to do something to improve our finances. As in, both of us. He is very child-like in his approach to finances. He expects me to take care of everything, all of the bill paying and all of the decision-making. One thing about having control is that you DO have all of the control, but also all of the burden. I mentioned that if I could make $200-$250 a month selling items online and he could find something to do that netted the same amount it would help a lot. He didn't respond. I stepped up my efforts and have hit my goal each month since then. I mention it when a book sells for an especially good price but he is just polite, nothing more.

I'm been feeling a growing unhappiness over the past year about how things are going and that scares me. DH works in a manufacturing atmosphere and it sounds terrible. He tells me things about his job, his co-workers and duties, and it's all I can do to sit still and listen.

It's not that I'm not interested or don't like to talk with him, but something has been really bothering me. It's this; why doesn't he get the heck out of there? Look around for something different? Develop some skills, get some education, something? Anything?

Well, I can't very well complain about something that I'm not doing myself, so that's when I decided to look into returning to finish my degree. I know that most campuses have job placement assistance, so that will be a great resource.